Monday, August 29, 2011


Nope.  Not gonna do that today.  I know I seem irreverent, but PTSD and OCD, are sort of under control.  I'm down to grinding my teeth at night and a Katrina dream every four months or so.  Just can't do it.  Have a nice day and thank God, Allah, The Goddess or just plain old be grateful that you didn't live it.  Peace.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Attention Hurricane Newbies: A Guide for Those on the East Coast

Miss you Mr. Nash.
     I can't help it, I don't know why, but whenever there is a hurricane I find myself plastered to the TV.  Perhaps it's because it's something I've grown up with.  I guess I'm sort of old school; I grew up when a hurricane in the Gulf meant that the entire Gulf practically shut down with trying to guess which way she was going to go.  New Orleans had Nash Roberts, (The Weather God), so not only did we have the advantage of a psychic meteorologist, (seriously he was born with a caul), we also had a guy who taught us about the weather when we watched the weather.  I miss Nash and his black marker; I just don't trust anyone else like I trusted Nash.  Oh well, I digress...

      Ahem.  Here Goes...

1.  The kids will always break the flashlight or use up the batteries.  Always

2.  If Jim Cantore aka The Angel of Death, shows up in your town, evacuate.

3.  When the insurance adjuster shows up, remember they get bonuses for keeping their numbers low so crying won't help.

4.  If the contractor's license plate is from out of state, remember that guy is no helpmate.  He will instead deplete your estate.

5.  Fly tape.

6.  For your own sake clean out your freezer and BBQ for the neighbors.  Rancid meat smell, not good.

7.  The generator doesn't like you and will refuse to start on the first seventeen tries.

8.  You are going to curse yourself for putting tape on those windows.

9.  You have a 50% chance of FEMA losing your 7 page application, so drive that 50-100 miles for the electricity to make copies.

10.  People will loot your house and steal your identity, (see #4 for out of state license plate).  Seriously.

11.  You will cry when served a hot meal after two weeks of eating vienna sausage and spam.

12.  The National Guard love to watch newbies use those heating elements in MREs.  Ouch.

13.  It takes 3x longer to put everything back in the yard than it did to pick it up.

14.  You will learn that the people at the GAP insurance for your car are going to be simply amazed that you want to file a claim.  (By the way, there were no less than 15 different items I needed to gather up before they would honor the claim so just a heads up on the scavenger hunt they are going to send you on.)

15.  The only way to stay somewhat sane is to laugh at yourself.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Feeling Homesick

(Warning I'm whining and complaining here.  Sorry no pics either, maybe I'll add them later.)  I've been up at my sister's house for over a month now and while I love visiting her, there is usually a turning point where I begin to miss home.  I don't just mean my house, bed, husband, friends, etc.  I mean I miss going to the store and being called, "baby," by the lady at the register.  I miss hearing a roomful of  yats, yat, when I walk into a restaurant.  I want to stand in a line and chat with people I don't know in a way that has non New Orleanians wondering how all these people know one another.  I miss the crazy people.  I've only seen one guy talking to himself while making wild gestures since I've been here.  There is no under current, no vibe, no rhythm, no soul here.  My energy is off kilter.

I'm going to need a big dose of NOLA funk when I get home.  I'm gonna hit Rocky's, head for my bar in the Quarter and people watch, I'm going to hit a music club where the musicians share a piece of their soul with their audience.  I'm heading to my friends' houses and having a cup of coffee and gossip ya ya style.  Most importantly, I'm heading over to see my mom-n-dem, (see yat dictionary), and am hoping to get some stewed okra out of the deal.  Sigh, in just under a week and I'll be back home and missing my sister and thinking how good I had it up here.  : P